Men in boots (1) Dec 16, 2009
I alluded to this in the distant past and I'll say it again:  I have a real hard time feigning respect for men who decide it's acceptable to wear boots in public.  I'm not talking about work boots or snow boots, which both serve a legitimate purpose.  I'm talking about cowboy boots and dress boots and whatever else it's called when leather shoes have a pointed toe and a "modest" heel and go past the ankle.  On men.  It's at least slightly ridiculous to see a grown man wearing pointed, heeled footwear.  That's my opinion.  I'm sticking with it. #lifestyle
Invisible forces Nov 20, 2009
Sometimes something will happen that will convince me that there are tiny, invisible men all around us that prevent certain bad things from happening, and we should make it our goal in life to learn as much about these creatures as possible and worship them accordingly. 

For example, sometimes I drop things.  Like plates and cups.  Made of glass.  Yet they don't break.  Everything I know about physics and strengths of materials tells me that glass objects break when enough force is applied.  Yet, magically, this isn't the case.  The only possible explanation is tiny, invisible men. 

Just a few minutes ago I was unloading stuff from my car when my coffee cup tipped onto its side.  It was more than halfway full, yet it didn't spill.  I saw it happen and quickly set it upright, then stared in amazement at the lack of spillage.  Once again, tiny, invisible men. #lifestyle
Joys of children Oct 14, 2009
A single person's thoughts on children: 
Most of my married friends now have children, the rewards of which appear to be exclusively intangible and, like the mysteries of some gnostic sect, incommunicable to outsiders. In fact it seems from the outside as if these people have joined a dubious cult: they claim to be much happier and more fulfilled than ever before, even though they live in conditions of appalling filth and degradation, deprived of the most basic freedoms and dignity, and owe unquestioning obedience to a capricious and demented master.

I have never even idly thought for a single passing second that it might make my life nicer to have a small, rude, incontinent person follow me around screaming and making me buy them stuff for the rest of my life.
(via Kottke)

Related:  Joys of parenthood #lifestyle
Do nothing then rest Sep 21, 2009
A quote from a book I've been reading: 
How beautiful it is to do nothing, and then rest afterward.
Apparently it's a Spanish proverb.  Reminds me of my favorite Dove Promise:  You're allowed to do nothing.  On a related note, a hammock is one of the best investments I've ever made. #lifestyle
Cops always win Aug 31, 2009
I don't have much experience with cops, and this topic isn't in response to a recent run-in with the law, but just an observation (slightly in reference to the Henry Louis Gates thing):  Cops always win.  You'll never have the last word in an argument with a cop.  You'll never get to plead your case to a cop after you push them around or yell at them.  Cops are always right.  Cops don't make mistakes.  They are the law.  They enforce the law to the letter and then some.  And if you provoke them, they'll arrest you, plain and simple. #lifestyle
Universal quiet hours (2) Aug 20, 2009
Not everyone has a nine-to-five job, but I still think the world should (and usually does) adhere to the universal quiet hours of 10pm through 8am.  No loud activities should take place during these hours, including lawn-mowing, music-blasting, and collecting every single glass object from your house and individually throwing it into a garbage can from a height of four feet. #lifestyle
Sandals at work Aug 3, 2009
I'm a dude, and dudes wear shoes at work.  But there's something wrong with the air conditioning, so I end up just taking my shoes off at my desk anyway.  So I figured, heck, why don't I just wear sandals to work?  Am I afraid I'll upset the already lax dress code?  Don't my jeans and polo shirts already do that?  If it comes down to it and somebody mentions something about the way I look (hey at least I take showers), I might consider doing something.  Otherwise I'll continue to believe that my appearance and my quality of work should remain mutually exclusive.  Sandals it is. #lifestyle
Backup purchase Jul 29, 2009
One time I found the perfect pair of sneakers, so I went back to the store a few weeks later and bought a second pair as backup.  Last summer I found the best sandals I've ever worn, so I bought a backup pair of them as well.  I do this with jeans and shirts and a few other things because I have peculiar and picky tastes and am often disappointed by the newer version of something I already own.  I'm obviously not in the running for any fashion awards, but at least I can satisfy my silly little need for regularity. #lifestyle
Rooming house Jul 24, 2009
There's a new building being built in Seattle that will serve as a "rooming house," offering single-person dwellings about the size of a parking space for about $500 per month. 
The rooms are small -- about the size of a parking space -- but the project's developers say they fit the budget and lifestyle of young adults who might be working as baristas or $12-an-hour clerks in big-box stores.
It's pretty much like a college dorm, except that the rooms will have private bathrooms and the residents will have jobs.  All utilities and broadband internet are included in the price, which makes it perfect for the un-wealthy young adults it's geared towards.  I personally think it's genius and, if I worked in the city and wasn't already married and didn't already live in a normal-sized house, wouldn't mind using it as a cheap place to crash while living close to a job. 

(via Obscure Store) #lifestyle
Marriage name rules (4) Jun 22, 2009
I've witnessed and been the victim of several naming fiascoes brought on by dating and marriage, and I think the world should agree upon the following set of rules: 
  1. Women, don't marry a guy whose last name is the same as your first name.  This would've prevented the marriage of my friend Kelly Callahan to her boyfriend Joe Kelly, thus creating Kelly Kelly.
  2. Women, don't marry a guy whose last name rhymes with your first name, such as Julia Gulia from the Wedding Singer, which didn't end up happening because Adam Sandler saved the day.
  3. Men and women, don't marry a person whose first name is the same as that of one of your family members, such as my sister marrying a guy named Dave.  Otherwise, prepare yourself for an unwelcome nickname, such as "Number 2" or ""Dingus".
I call these rules for marriage, but really they should be considered the moment you meet any new person.  Before you even consider being attracted to them, you should think, "What would happen if we got married?"  If caught early enough, these naming issues could be eradicated completely. #lifestyle