UPS Whiteboard (2) Jan 15, 2008
I think those UPS Whiteboard commercials that are mostly played during football games are stupid.  What annoys me most is that UPS hired some shaggy-haired artist to draw pictures that illustrate frighteningly simple points.  For example, here's my impression of the guy on the commercials: 
"You know how you sometimes have to mail packages?"
*squiggle* *squiggle* *draw* *draw*
"Well instead of taking them to the UPS store, you can also deposit them in a UPS drop box."
*erase* *erase* *squiggle* *draw*
"Whether you use the UPS store or a UPS drop box, UPS will still mail your packages to the right place."
"That's the beauty of the UPS Multiple Acceptance SystemTM."
"Let's add some mud flaps on the truck and a stupid smile on the person putting a package in the drop box."
*squiggle* *squiggle*
For whatever reason, UPS treats it like rocket science, complete with complicated terminology and needless illustrations.  I just don't get what the big deal is.  You give your package to UPS and they mail it.  That's it.  Why are their commercials and sponsorships and websites devoted to this? #entertainment
How to eat a muffin (2) Jan 11, 2008
Some Fridays, I treat myself to a coffee cake muffin from Dunkin Donuts.  I haven't been around all that long, but I don't think there's anything better than treating yourself to something you probably shouldn't have and likely don't need.  If my life ended in the midst of it, it would be worth it. 

Like many foods, muffins have a good part and a bad part.  The good part of my coffee cake muffin is obviously the top, which is covered in crunchies.  The bad part is the rest of the muffin, which as far as I'm concerned, is just filler that enables Dunkin Donuts to charge anything more than $0.25. 

The dilemma I always face is whether to dive right into the good part and suffer with the bad part later, or eat the bad part first while anxiously anticipating the good part.  Some days I have a few ounces of patience, so I'll stuff the filler into the mouth and chew it in an almost obligatory fashion.  Today wasn't one of those days.  I dove right into the good part and loved every second of it. #food
Katrina lawsuit Jan 10, 2008
Hurricane Katrina was a big deal.  No doubt about that.  And despite my gut reaction of "What'd you expect when your city is technically below sea level?" I can still empathize with all the people who lost all their homes and their stuff. 

But suing the Army Corps of Engineers for $3 quadrillion?  What are you, like 5?  That's barely even an actual number. #entertainment
Caucus this Jan 9, 2008
I know nothing about politics and couldn't give an airborne rodent's posterior about current events.  But I think it's funny that the powers that be gave two important political thingies, the Iowa Caucus and the New Hampshire Primary, to the two biggest loser states in the country.  Seriously, name one thing Iowa is known for besides the fact that it has a college football team.  It's even worse than Idaho, whose only claim to fame is a stupid tuber.  And New Hampshire?  Who even goes there?  Everybody knows about Vermont.  It's for lovers.  People have heard of Maine because it's the farthest state from anything.  But New Hampshire?  Phththbthbbb. 
[Image: caucus.jpg]
And yes, the word "caucus" sounds like there should be an ointment associated with it. #politics
New site design #3 (2) Jan 9, 2008
It's been almost two years since I last redesigned my website, and I've been thinking about changing things around for the past several months.  Every now and then I'd get an idea and start writing HTML for a few days, but it kept trickling off for one of several reasons: 
  1. It looked too much like the old design.
  2. I couldn't decide on colors.
  3. I couldn't figure out positioning with css and divs.
I got an idea sometime late last week and went with it.  That idea is what you're currently looking at.  I wanted something simple and clean, and most of all, I wanted something new (I was sick of the old design).  Instead of wasting more time designing and testing things, I decided to just upload the new design and figure it out from there.  So there might be a few problems here and there which I'll fix as they occur.  For the technically minded, here's what's new: 
  1. A fixed-width layout.  No more percentages and scaling.
  2. Less PHP-processed linkage in and around the site.
  3. (Possibly) standards-compliant.
  4. No more fieldsets!
  5. Tables, not divs.  I hate divs.
If I get sick of this design in a day or two, I might go back to the drawing board.  I just needed something new. #technology
Babykeeper (5) Jan 9, 2008
Introducing the Babykeeper. 
[Image: babykeeper.png]
Finally, a way to hang kids from walls.  (via Presurfer) #products
Bad names for girls (1) Jan 8, 2008
Attention people of the world:  Please allow the following girl names to [somewhat] gracefully retire from common usage: 
  1. Fran
  2. Gertrude
  3. Phyllis
  4. Lois
  5. Eleanor
  6. Jean
  7. Beatrice
Sorry to anyone I like who currently has one of these names.  If I don't like you, I'm not sorry. #language
Pharmaceutical advertising Jan 7, 2008
The Public Library of Science says drug companies spend $57.5 billion on marketing, compared to $31.5 billion on research.  It's a major conflict of interest when a company geared towards improving your health is really just after your money.  (via Consumerist) #entertainment
Know your stuff Jan 7, 2008
I get annoyed when people who should know their stuff don't know their stuff.  Especially when "knowing their stuff" is pretty specific and would seem to be not only relevant but essential to proper job performance. 

Case in point #1:  Trying to buy an iPod from Best Buy the week after Christmas.  Walked in the store, prepared to buy one, only to be told they're out of stock and won't be in for a few weeks.  When asked if one could be bought from the website, the portable music center employees (2) said the website would be out of stock too.  A normal person would believe them because, after all, who better to ask about portable music players than the people who work in that section of Best Buy, whose only care in the world is the sale of portable music players and the information required therein.  But what do I find on the Best Buy website?  iPods.  Billions of them.  On sale.  With free shipping.  Thanks Best Buy portable music center.  Pull your heads out of your butts and know your stuff.  At least check your own company's website. 

Case in point #2:  Who would know more about video games than those dorks at GameStop?  Apparently some other dude, because those dorks don't know crap.  I went in to buy some games and asked one of the guys a question about one of the games.  I realize there are no less than five different gaming systems currently on the market, and each system has somewhere in the area of hundreds of games.  There's no way a person could know every game on every system.  However, if a game has a recognizable name and has been around for a few years, I'd expect a GameStop dork to know about it.  Or at least to have read a review.  Or at least to be able to make up a quick lie on the spot.  But, no.  I got none of that.  All I got was a pasty, facial-haired, "Sorry sir, but will that be all?"  Yes that will be all.  Thanks for nothing. #technology
Camera phone Jan 7, 2008
Instead of starting with a cell phone and shoving a cheap little camera into it, I think cell phone makers should start with a legitimate digital camera and add some simple phone capabilities.  That would make a much better camera phone. #technology