Loud music (2) Oct 3, 2006
Prompted by JSW's comment, I was reminded of something that's sort of been on my mind:  The next time you get tired of the music you're listening to and you can't figure out what your problem is, turn the volume up about 3-4 times louder than it normally is.  It'll give you a completely renewed appreciation for your music, it'll open your ears to what's been going on in the background of the songs you like, and it'll drown out all other noises and distractions. 

I'm convinced that some music needs to be listened to at a high volume.  AC/DC cannot be listened to softly.  You'd be doing a disservice to Chris Cornell and company if you listened to Audioslave at anything less than 70% full volume.  Rage Against the Machine and Soundgarden are the same way (hence the similarities in all three bands' members).  Jet, with their rockstar hey's and yeah's, needs to be blasted.  If any of this music is listened to at low levels, it's completely different.  You don't get the whole experience.  In every type of music, there's some other "thing" that's being conveyed by the writer/performer, whether it's anger or energy or just a chest-thumping guitar riff.  This experience can only be had by turning up the volume.  I would also suggest being alone or with someone very like-minded, and if driving, rolling down the windows and turning it up even louder. #entertainment
Drivers of nice cars (3) Oct 2, 2006
It's repeatedly brought to my attention that drivers of nice cars can't drive.  I always find myself angrily speeding past a Mercedes going under the speed limit.  I keep getting stuck behind people in BMWs who don't use their turn signals.  And sexy sports cars like Porsches and Corvettes can't seem to keep up with my 4-cylinder Japanese import.  I wonder why this is.  I suppose it could have something to do with what Spiderman's grandfather said:  "With great power comes great responsibility."  Maybe these people are constantly thinking about the rising costs of car insurance, so they make sure their already pricey rates don't go any higher.  Though I doubt a Mercedes owner thinks too much about car insurance. 

Maybe the kinds of people who drive expensive cars are bad drivers because they're incredibly stupid.  Maybe the smell of money has burned out a large percentage of their brain cells, so they're left with a semi-functional brain and a nose that sticks slightly into the air.  These are the same kinds of people who don't know how to fill their own gas tank or replace their wiper blades.  They drive around in the ultimate comfort of their luxury cars, unaware of their physical setting and the surrounding cars, blissfully observing the colorful changing of autumn leaves while listening to the latest 3 Tenors CD.  These people spend their afternoons driving to and from Pier 1 and Panera, thinking about how they can fit their anti-war demonstration in with their wine-tasting event.  They're covered with the scent of smooth leather seats and the dirt of rich BMW-owner brake dust. 

I despise these vile human beings.  And they can't drive. #travel
Football likes and dislikes Oct 2, 2006
I watched the Bears pummel the Seahawks for a little while last night, and I was reminded again that I sometimes like watching football just for the sake of watching football, regardless of whether or not I like the teams or if the outcome can possibly affect me in any way.  Football is a great sport, and here's why: 

1.  Linebackers.  Somebody should make a video of Brian Urlacher or Tedy Bruschi and call it "How to Play Football".  Guys like this do things right.  They hit hard, they tackle perfectly, they intercept passes, they rush and sack the quarterback.  In my opinion, linebackers are the defense. 

2.  Fullbacks.  The average fullback is one of the most under-appreciated players on the field.  This is the guy who makes the star running back the star running back.  He runs, catches passes, and throws powerful blocks by running through people.  He's the offensive equal to the linebacker. 

3.  Perfect tackles (the action, not the position).  I'm not talking about the "big hit" or the knee shot.  I'm talking about a tackle straight out of the instruction manual.  "Wrap both arms around player's legs; squeeze; watch player fall to ground."  It's not showy or exciting, but it's simple and gets the job done.  I'd rather count on a player's ability to take an opponent down than on his ability to hit. 

4.  Solid blocks.  There's just nothing better than watching somebody make a perfect block.  It usually happens downfield, when a player is running with the ball and defenders are running towards him.  That's when somebody like a fullback runs full-force into an unsuspecting defensive back, lifts him off his feet, and sends him to the ground.  [Physics content] Never underestimate the power of momentum. 

5.  The stiff-arm.  Although most people hate Terrell Owens, he has one thing going for him:  He can stiff-arm better than anyone.  When little tiny defensive backs try to grab onto him to bring him down, he just sticks out one of his gigantor arms and keeps the defender's head away from him.  Without a head, a defender has quite a difficult time tackling. 

6.  Endzone celebrations.  Though controversial, endzone celebrations are a blend of happiness, team pride, and entertainment.  Think of where the world would be without the Joe Horn cell phone call, the Randy Moss mooning incident, and the now-common Lambeau Leap.  It adds a whole new dimension to the game:  Pride for the winner, shame for the loser. 

These things are what make football a great sport.  But then there are a few things that take away from football's greatness: 

1.  The low hit.  This is a difficult one.  Low hits are perfectly legal.  In fact, they're necessary.  A defender can't take down a running back if the running back gets lower than the defender.  He'll have nothing to grab onto.  But you only need to witness one severe knee injury to hate everything about the low hit. 

2.  Defensive back tackles.  As opposed to a linebacker tackle or the "perfect tackle", a defensive back tackles by impact.  It's stupid, unnecessary, largely ineffective, and often causes injuries.  The only reason defensive backs are able to take people down is because several of them team up like a swarm of bees to attack a foe.  If it was one defensive back against one offensive back, the offender would plow right through the defender's armless tackle.  It's the exact opposite of what's taught in the instruction manual. 

3.  Sideline reporters.  Although this has nothing to do with the actual game of football, it's an unavoidable by-product of watching a televised game.  I personally have no interest in anything Tony Siragusa or Pam Oliver have to say.  I think that not only do they add nothing to the game, they actually take something away from it.  Listening to them scream into their microphones while a play is happening shows that they have no concept of what's actually happening on the field. #sports
Have a nice day Sep 29, 2006
"Have a nice day."  I hear those words quite often.  When I buy a coffee and a muffin from Dunkin Donuts, the cashier (barista) says, "Have a nice day."  When I go through the security checkpoint at work, the guard says, "Have a nice day."  When I go out to lunch, the cashier (and/or sandwich maker) says, "Have a nice day."  When I buy a few little things at ShopRite or Walmart, the checkout person says, "Have a nice day."  When I fill up my gas tank at the beautiful new QuickChek in Hopatcong, the filler-upper says, "Have a nice day."  In my daily life, that's most likely the phrase I hear most often. #psychology
Trying AdSense again (2) Sep 29, 2006
I decided to give Google AdSense another try.  I tried it several months ago, but I wasn't impressed by my meager earnings or by the oodles of JavaScript required to display the "unobtrusive" ads.  From the very beginning of my "web presence", I've been a fan of simplicity, and ads seem to make things more complicated by adding more code and displaying a bunch of unnecessary junk.  However, I'd like to try to make some money by doing something I enjoy.  I already have a website.  I already enjoy writing stupid things.  Why not make some money in the process? 

You, the reader, can help me by clicking on some ads.  I only get paid if the ads are clicked.  So even if you're not interested in the ads or you hate them altogether, throw me a bone by clicking on them.  You'll be making the world a better place ... by putting more money in my pocket ... which, in turn, I can pass on to you ... though I probably won't. 

Update (2006-09-29 3:56pm):  I'm also trying out ADster at the bottom of the page.  Initially, I'm not too happy with some of the content of the ads, but we'll see how things go. 

Update (2006-10-02 11:10am):  Adster had too many "adult chat" ads, so I ditched them.  Next up is AdBrite. 

Update (2006-10-03 11:28am):  AdSense wasn't doing too well for me financially, so I replaced it with AdBrite.  AdBrite is now my sole advertiser.  I'll probably write about my findings at some point. 

Update (2006-10-05 12:10am):  I got rid of the big ads at the bottom because they were ugly and took too long too load.  Also, I came up with a way to only show ads for every 5th post or so, so they should be less "intrusive".  And I'm trying out Text Link Ads because I've heard they're good.  Plus, they make a WordPress plugin.  Zing! #entertainment
Twenty-four inch widescreen (2) Sep 29, 2006
Twenty-four inch widescreen.  These four words should bring utter exhilaration and uber-tech-geek elation.  But for the past few days, they've brought me nothing but dissatisfaction and a desire for a downgrade.  I've been using one of these things as my PC monitor for a couple days, and I have only one thing so say:  It's too big.  It's so big that I installed Google Desktop and expanded the sidebar to fill up 25% of the screen.  It's so big that I moved the monitor to the right so that I only have to focus on the left 75% of the screen.  It's a completely unusable amount of space.  My eyes can't see that much information at once.  My brain can't process it.  I actually have to move my head to see two opposite ends of the monitor.  It's ridiculous.  And once again, I'm confronted with the question of "Why?".  Why do people like widescreen?  Why is this format in use?  Ok, I understand its use in TV and movies, but why computers?  I don't watch movies on my computer.  I read websites.  I write things.  I play with engineering tools like Excel and Matlab.  I don't need 20.5 inches of horizontal viewing space.  Nor do I need 12.75 inches in the vertical.  I'm very tempted to go back to my "old" 19-incher.  It offered me plenty of space and never felt too big to comprehend.  Like most technologies, I thought, "19 inches?  Who would ever need anything bigger than 19 inches?"  They tried to pursuade me, "You don't know what you're missing."  Oh, how they were wrong. #technology
Right turn on red Sep 28, 2006
There's a traffic light at the exit of my job.  I need to turn right, so I often make a right on red.  Wikipedia says this is legal in all 50 states, D.C., Guam, and Puerto Rico, though not in New York City (with the exception of a sign saying otherwise).  But for some reason, some people just sit there and wait.  There's no question as to whether or not it's a traffic light or whether or not it's a right turn.  And it apparently isn't dependent on the person's place of origin because I've need several different states' license plates.  I just don't understand what the problem is.  Sure, it's a 3-lane highway with a 55-mph speed limit, but most times the rightmost lane is empty.  A few times in the past, I've beeped at the person in front of me to persuade them to make the turn.  And they made the turn, signifying that they knew they were allowed to and they really want to, but they just needed some encouragement.  Yesterday, I was sitting behind a lady who had about 40 separate chances to make the right turn, but she just didn't do it.  She even looked in her rearview mirror at me to see how mad I was.  I just took a few deep breaths and had a good time observing my blood pressure fluctuate.  It's not that I was in any kind of rush or had anything important to do.  I was just on my way home from work.  But I just can't get used to the idea of not making a turn when I know it's totally legal and I'm fully capable.  It probably has something to do with my belief that driving is a complete waste of time.  The only way I could possibly defend these people is by saying that it can be a little intimidating to pull out into fast-moving traffic.  It can be even more difficult if you have an old and/or wimpy car.  But that's not the case with these people, because as soon as the light turns green, they gun it and practically peal out of there.  It they're able to peal out, I'm absolutely sure they wouldn't have a problem making the right on red. #travel
Time measurement (4) Sep 28, 2006
I have an utter inability to comprehend quantities of time that are measured in improper units.  When somebody says, "My baby is 56 weeks old," I can't even begin to figure out what that means in normal people terms.  56 weeks?  If there are usually 4 weeks in a month, that means there are like ... 12 months in a year ... 12 divided by 4 ... 24 hours in a day ... I give up. 

I saw a commercial on TV the other day that talked about a 96 hour sale.  What?  How many weeks is that?  I know there are 24 hours in a day, but 96 isn't an obvious product of 24 (to me anyway).  I get 24.  I get 48.  But after that, I start to lose it. 

Most financial loans are measured in months.  My 5-year car loan says I'm on month 33.  My 30-year mortgage says I'm on month 345.  What does that mean?  How many years is that? #technology
Voting with marbles Sep 28, 2006
People in the African nation of Gambia vote in elections by placing a marble into a drum that represents their candidate.  As the marble goes into the drum, it rings a bell so the voting officials can make sure people don't vote more than once.  Counting the votes is simple:  All the marbles are placed into a tray with a certain number of marble-shaped spaces.  Sounds quite a bit more effective than those stupidly archaic punch cards and those painfully defective Diebold machines.  (via Neatorama) #politics
StickyKeys, FilterKeys, ToggleKeys Sep 27, 2006
If you're like me, you hate a lot of inanimate things.  One of the things I hate is when my computer does things I don't tell it to do.  For example, every new installation of Windows XP comes with the accessibility options "StickyKeys", "FilterKeys", and "ToggleKeys" enabled.  These are completely stupid and useless features that pop up a dialog box when the user holds down the shift key for more than 8 seconds or makes some other sort of strange keyboard entry.  In my opinion, these "features" shouldn't be enabled by default.  You say, "They're easy to turn off, you idiot," but I say, "Check again".  The Accessibility Options Control Panel applet show 3 unchecked check boxes, which tells me that these functions are disabled.  Wrong!  Try again.  Those checkboxes mean nothing apparently, because the real functionality is enabled or disabled by clicking on the Settings button for each function and unchecking the "Use shortcut" box.  I find it annoyingly ironic that the "Accessibility" features of Windows aren't very "accessible". 

So anyway, here's the solution.  Download this registry file (via Joho).  Double-click on it (or open it) and say yes to adding it to your registry.  Now, reset or logoff/logon your computer.  Everything should work now.  Obviously, you could just manually disable each of the accessibility functions (without resetting), but this is another way to do it. #technology