One of the most hideous and ridiculous things that happens atop peoples' heads is the comb over.  Wikipedia defines a comb over as "a hairstyle worn by bald or balding men where the hair on one side of the head is grown long and then combed over the bald area."  Calling this atrocity a "hairstyle" is quite a stretch.  It's more like a "joke" or a "mistake" or a "failure to admit baldness".  Whenever I see a comb over, I'm tempted to have a little heart-to-heart with the perpetrator.  "Hey man, listen.  You're bald.  Everyone knows it.  You couldn't hide it if you spray-painted your head black.  So just admit you're bald and move on.  Lots of people are bald.  Being bald doesn't make you any less of a man.  Having a comb over makes you less of a man." 

I think it's oddly appropriate when a comb over goes horribly wrong.  I saw a guy at a restaurant the other day who grew his hair out to about 8 inches long so that he could slick it over the top of his completely bald head.  He looked ridiculous.  And as the meal continued, part of the long stuff started to unstick from top of his head and dangle down the back.  He looked like Gollum from Lord of the Rings.  It was both funny and gross at the same time. 

I've already decided that I won't have a comb over when I go bald. 

On an interesting side note, the comb over was patented in 1977. #lifestyle