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Waiting in line to talk
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Aug 9, 2007
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A few years ago, right after I graduated college, I went to the church I grew up in. I was recently engaged, and I remember seeing a guy there who I hadn't seen or talked to in a few years, and I heard he was also engaged. After the service, I went over to talk to him. At the moment, he was talking to someone, likely about how he recently graduated from college and/or had gotten engaged. I waited patiently for a chance to have a word with him, seeing that we had quite a bit in common. I remember trying to make eye contact with him as a silent "Hey, good to see you; we'll talk in a few minutes." I waited for an uncomfortably long time and finally reached the point where I couldn't care less whether I talked to this guy or not. So I went home and didn't think about it again.
But a similar experience last week reminded me of it. I was standing in line to sign up for a graduate class, and two people ahead of me was a guy I had previously traveled with for work. At one point, he turned around and started talking to the person behind me. My plan initially was to avoid him altogether, not because I didn't like him, but because I literally don't enjoy human interaction, especially when we have so little in common and therefore so little to say to each other. Him: Done any more traveling lately? Me: Nope. You? Him: Nope. But since he turned around, I felt obligated to say hi. I attempted to make eye contact with him, again as a silent "Hey, good to see you; we'll talk in a few minutes." What would normally be a simple endeavor turned out to be a massive internal struggle about how long it would take to stare at a person before things got weird. I decided the length of time I had already stared was plenty, so I looked away and thought about other things. We both signed up for classes and left the building without talking to each other.
Moral of the story: I refuse to wait in line to talk to people. If it's really important, I'm sure you'll come find me. Otherwise it's just not worth my time or effort. #psychology
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