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Urinalysis Thu, Mar 30, 2006
There's nothing quite like walking down the hallway of your doctor's office at 8am on a Thursday morning, carrying a warm cup of your own urine and walking by people who are staring at you in amazement/disgust.  As if it isn't degrading enough to be told, "Go pee in a cup", you're forced to walk past a bunch of strangers and navigate through difficult obstacles to drop off your "sample".  I wonder how many times accidents have happened.  A person is walking down the hall and ... whoops ... they trip on their own foot, fall flat on their face, and pour their cup of urine all over the floor/bystanders.  That's a life-changing event, both for the spiller and spillee.  You don't just go living your life like normal after you get somebody else's urine on you. 

I went to one doctor who asked patients to bring the cup up to the desk and place it on the desk.  This desk, for clarification, was at chest level.  Chest level, for further clarification, is pretty close to face level.  As if it isn't weird enough to hold a cup of someone else's urine, these people held cups of other people's urine close to their faces.  That's just disgusting.  Also, since we don't live in a perfect world, I'm sure there had to be at least one person who put their cup down on the desk and accidentally knocked it over.  And urine is the kind of thing that's not easily forgotten.  It's not like spilling your cup of coffee.  Urine has bacteria and disease and other not-so-positive things.  Not to mention the fact that it's urine.  How do you tell people, "You might not want to put your candy bar down on this desk.  Some idiot just spilled his own pee."?  Or, "Hey honey.  My day went pretty well.  Except for that whole urine-all-over-my-shirt deal.  That wasn't too cool." 

Side note:  I think it's funny that they have cups labeled "Urine Collection Container".  This person thinks it's funny too. #entertainment


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