I have something against Great Britain.  You're thinking, "What could this idiot possibly have to say about Great Britain?  He's never left the country."  Wrong:  I've been to Canada several times, and I went to Jamaica for my honeymoon.  Plus, my brother-in-law-in-law (sister-in-law's husband) is Puerto Rican.  I'm extremely cultured. 

So here's my thing against Great Britain:  I don't think they should be using an adjective in the name of the country.  It's like saying Awesome America or Fruity France.  Countries shouldn't be described by adjectives unless they're physically descriptive:  Greenland (though it's more icy than green), Iceland (though it's more green than icy), Turkey (kidding).  To call yourself "Great" Britain shows that you think quite highly of yourself. 

But just to show that I'm not the biggest idiot on earth, here's the real reason behind the title:  The Roman geographer Ptolemy called the larger island off the coast of Europe "Megale Brettania" which translates into "Great Britain".  Another explanation is that the French started calling it "Grande Bretagne" to distinguish it from the French province of Brittany.  So basically, the "Great" refers to size, not self-proclaimed worth. 

But instead of going along with knowledge and logic, I'm gonna stick to my stupidness by refusing to use the word "great" before the word "britain".  Take that, rooineks!