The wife and I spent last week in Punta Cana, Dominican Republic.  It was our second trip there, and it was still good.  There isn't much to recap, since we spent all day laying around the beach or the pool, reading books and drinking fruity drinks.  But I have some typical first world problems I'd like to address, so let's get started. 

We stayed at Presidential Suites, which is an all-inclusive place that apparently exists as a way to sell timeshares, or more accurately "memberships in a vacation club".  They offer cheap rooms with the caveat that you must sit through a sales pitch.  This wasn't particularly terrible (except for the part where I said I'd rather be enjoying my vacation and they angrily told me I would never get such a good deal again), but it was a small hassle.  The salespeople kept asking throughout the week if we sat through the presentation, which suggests there was no way to track this one way or the other, which further suggests we could've just lied about it and avoided it altogether.  Next time. 

The rooms were big and nice.  We had a two bed, two bath "villa" that probably had more square footage than our tiny house.  It also had a kitchen, which is irrelevant at an all-inclusive resort. 

The food wasn't very good.  I wasn't expecting gourmet dining, but it still just wasn't that great.  I did manage to finally order an awesome sea bass wrapped in a banana leaf, which was so good I ordered a second one.  But other than that, there was a lot of under-cooked meat and unlabeled buffet options. 

The alcohol selection was kind of impressive.  The beer was the local cheap crappy stuff, as was the wine, but the mixed drinks were the real thing.  Real Jack Daniels.  Real Kahlua.  This made me happy. 

The beach was small and a little crowded, but that's the norm.  There were resorts in either direction for as far as the eye could see, and the tourism industry kept pace by providing lots of pushy sellers of ridiculous things.  Technically tourism created tourism, so it's our fault. 

The time frame sort of coincided with college spring break, which I thought might add a little fun and entertainment to the mix.  But I forgot how much I don't like people, especially young people.  There weren't many college kids, but the ones that were there complained how boring things were at the resort.  Shut up, stupid kids. 

On an unexpected note, the hotel staff was pretty awesome.  They were all really friendly and attentive, which isn't something I typically care about.  But there's just something special about lounging in a hammock on a sunny beach and being brought a well-made pina colada. 

Our flight home got cancelled due to maintenance issues while we were on the runway.  So the airline drove us two hours away and put us in a hotel for the night, after which our flight was almost cancelled again for the same reason.  This wasn't a good end to the trip, but duty-free $7 airport wine pretty much solved that problem. #travel

Edit:  A few things I forgot to mention:
  • The Dominican Republic has a completely arbitrary $10 per person tourist tax that must be paid in cash when you get off the plane.  We forgot to bring enough cash, so I had to go through customs and immigration temporarily to get cash from a human bank teller, who told me my bank declined the transaction but my credit card company accepted it.  I got charged a $15 fee from the human bank teller and a $10 fee by my credit card.  So that was fun.
  • Immediately after we got through customs and picked up our bags, some helpful gentleman asked us which limo company we were looking for and assured us he would help us find it, since we had pre-booked the airport-to-hotel transportation.  This gentleman brought us over to a table next to the other limo companies, and after a few back and forth exchanges, I realized he was totally lying to my face and that my limo company was five feet away.  Nothing like a scam with government oversight.
  • The weather was amazing.  It probably goes without saying, but the temperatures were in the low 80s, the skies were clear and blue, and the rain came and went quickly and infrequently.  This was especially nice considering the brutal winter we've had this year and the possibility of missing our flight out of New Jersey due to an incoming snow storm.