Nightlight failure
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Jun 8, 2010
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From The Onion, for the children: Tragedy struck the town of Maple Grove last night when a monster broke into the room of six-year-old Barry Davies. The creature brutally murdered and devoured the boy despite the presence of a protective Power Rangers nightlight. A forensics report says the beast violently shook the child, making him tastier through the release of flavor-enhancing adrenaline. The monster tore off and ate the boy's limbs first, enjoying his screams until the very end. The Consumer Product Safety Commission is calling for a full-scale investigation into the nightlight's failure. Sweet dreams. #products
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