Band geek hierarchy (6)
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Jun 12, 2008
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Last night at a BBQ in rural New Jersey, a panel of experts determined the official hierarchy of band geeks. Most people will note that all band people are geeks, so there's no need to make a distinction. But people who currently or have in the past referred to themselves as band geeks demanded their shred of dignity and thus created a list, from most geeky to least. - Marching band geek. These people are the biggest geeks. What better way to proclaim your absolute lack of athleticism than to purposefully sit in the stands at football games and play a musical instrument? Not only do these geeks perform poorly-arranged versions of 60s cover songs, they wear stupid uniforms and engage in synchronized marching. Biggest geeks ever.
- Pep band geek. The pep band is sort of like the marching band, but without the marching, and without the football. They're usually seen at basketball games and other indoor sporting events where they proudly shout their athletic ineptitude. Some may argue that they're actually more geeky than the marching band because they don't even do "cool" things like march or dress up in fancy costumes. I say whatever. A geek is a geek. Moving on.
- Concert band geek. Concert band is usually offered as an elective in high school. Geeks practice their songs daily and put on a concert once or twice a year, usually playing classical music and show tunes. Yes, show tunes. GEEKS!
- Pit band geek. The pit band is the group of highly-trained (and sometimes professional) musicians that play the accompanying music for the school play. These geeks are above other band geeks because they're often quite talented and are given the privilege of sitting next to geeks who get paid to play music. They'll occasionally be required to learn a new instrument, which is one of the highest honors in band-geekdom.
- Jazz band geek. These geeks are the rebels of band geeks. They play syncopated songs with irregular rhythm and often perform solos. They've even been known to allow a guitarist to play with them, which, in the world of band geeks, is the most bad-ass thing you can do. Jazz band geeks have even been known to throw wild parties while blasting Miles Davis and drinking wine coolers. WINE COOLERS!
So there you have it. The official band geek hierarchy. For the record, I've been a part of 4 of the 5 types of bands mentioned, and the only reason I wasn't in the pep band was because my school didn't have one. #entertainment
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Comments:
2008-06-12 11:17:13
i too was in 4 of the 5, though only pep band once. i didn't enjoy it as much as marching band. ;) though college marching band (i was a music major) was MUCH more lame, since they didn't even compete. it was really only about the stupid football game. wow i am a geek. i did after all eat lunch in the band room. i try to cover with the fact that i hung out with the 'pot head band geeks', but apparently even the druggie band nerds were still nerds.
my husband says he would've not talked to me if we met in highschool. he hung out with the soccer jocks. which means i probably would've had a secret crush on him but hated his friends.
ah highschool.
oh, sorry for the uber-long comment but: did y'all ever have "band parties" where you watch drum & bugle core videos? wow. that was lame.
2008-06-12 11:32:07
Perhaps the only thing more geeky than band itself is a band competition.
We never had official "band parties", but we had parties where all the people happened to be in band. But no, no drum and bugle videos. I've heard the rage these days is the movie Drumline.
2008-06-12 13:32:26
Question: Did said "panel" determine the combinations of the geekdom hierarchy? Perhaps some sort of scale? If you were in all five, are you more or less a geek than one with three? Does it depend on the three? This really is incomplete data. I would have expected more from a bunch of Band Geeks!
Jenn B: "Soccer Jock!?!?!" Really? That's as much of an oxymoron as "Band Stud." The soccer players were the only thing that brought the Band Geeks and the Football players together.
2008-06-15 23:04:07
4 out of 5 here, didn't have a pit band, but if we did I would have probably been in it. I would add a couple more I've been in as well: "garage band", "church band" and occasional "one-man band". ;)
2008-06-16 18:11:41
I've been thinking about this for a while now and I believe that five out of five sort of negates the geek score altogether. Analogous to a four-card straight in poker isn't worth much, but a 5 card straight is actually pretty good. And if by chance, you go on later in life to become a computer nerd, well...even more so. You're probably one of the coolest people around!
2008-06-16 18:59:06
Jeff: Garage band subtracts geek points, but church band adds geek points. One-man band ... I think that's neutral.
Rus: You fail.
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