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Don't buy me dinner (7) Mon, Mar 24, 2008
Wendy and I went out to dinner with another couple on Friday, and when the bill came, the other guy took it.  He said, "I got it."  I gave him the "why are we even doing this?" face and said, "Let's split it."  He refused.  I insisted.  He refused again.  I conceded.  Insisting again would've been taking things too far, so I let him win his little game.  I couldn't understand why he didn't at least want to split the bill.  If anything, we should've paid for them.  They're poor.  They're saving for a wedding.  They're really not in a position to be buying people meals, even if it was at a cheap pizza place.  But what really gets me is that, without question, the next time we go out, our side of the table will absolutely be obligated to pay.  And more than likely, we'll go to some expensive Italian place, order seven bottles of imported wine and dine on the finest of seafood and filet mignon, and during the whole meal, I'll be hating everything you do and say, knowing I'll have to pay for the calories that enable you to exist in the first place. 

Bottom line:  Don't buy me dinner unless it's completely clear that I owe you nothing.  I hate feeling obligated. #money

Comments:
Rus Mon, Mar 24, 2008
Dave,

Perhaps you should just graciously accept and then NOT pay next time.  Hey guys, let's do dinner again, and dude....this time...I insist...we go dutch!"

But here is what troubles me.  Seven bottles of wine?  Assuming a designated driver, that means over 2 bottle a person!  :-)
Dave Tue, Mar 25, 2008
But then I'll be the jerk.  It's a lose-lose. 

Seven might've been an exaggeration.  Five is a better estimate. 

(Just kidding.  I've never ordered a whole bottle of wine from a restaurant.  Most of my wine comes from a box.)
JENNA Tue, Mar 25, 2008
This just happened to me! Sometimes I go to lunch with someone I work with (but from another building) and he called yesterday to see if I wanted to go grab lunch. I thought that was fine - until he said - "you still owe me one." I was soooo mad! How do you call a girl and invite her to buy you lunch?!?!?! And usually we both just pay for our own except for once when we both only had debit cards, and I paid. The next time, he paid. I dont see how I owe him anything!!!!!!!!
I said "then we better reschedule" - and hung up. i will just go back top eating by myself!
Oh, and to top it off, I do his payroll and he only works a few hours a week. Maybe work a 40 hour week and buy your own lunch , broke ass!
Dave Tue, Mar 25, 2008
Go with the old "I'll let you know when I'm free" routine.  It fixes every problem.
Rus Tue, Mar 25, 2008
Wine in a box is awesome!!!!

Perhaps I'm a Jerk, I'm not quite sure....
A while back one guy at work asked me if I wanted to go to lunch.  I assume dutch in this case and he chose the place.  He then bought lunch for both of us and I kindly accepted.  Ironically, this was the same day that he told me that he had looked up my salary (all NC state employees salaries are public), and he makes about 80% of my salary.  I still didn't mind him buying though.  About two weeks ago, he asked if I wanted to join him for lunch, but I wasn't prepared to buy for both of us.  I assumed dutch and considering he went back to the same place without asking me, I had no intentions of buying his lunch.  As it turned out, he bought mine again and asked me to drop the tip.  Sort of embarrassing since I had no cash for a tip.  I've just concluded that I'm just less generous than him.
Dave Tue, Mar 25, 2008
In conclusion, we can all agree:  Don't pay for my meal.
Rus Tue, Mar 25, 2008
Exactly...but you're more than welcome to pay for mine.  ;-)

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