[This is about driving, not eating food in the parking lot of a football game.]

I learned this weekend that some people can be ravenous tailgaters without even knowing it.  Their habit is to ride uncomfortably close to the car in front of them, for no other reason than to ride uncomfortably close to the car in front of them.  I'm a believer in the idea that certain types of tailgating can have a purpose.  Sometimes you want to send somebody a message because they're driving 20 in a 25.  Ok, that's really the only time tailgating has a purpose.  All other times are unnecessary, and usually result in angry violence.  When somebody's tailgating me, I wish I finally got around to installing that rocket launcher I've been promising myself for years.  Or I at least wish I had a few overly ripe tomatoes in my passenger seat.  I especially hate being tailgated when there's a specific reason for driving the speed I'm driving.  Perhaps I got a speeding ticket there or ... really that's it.  I got a speeding ticket there three years ago on my sixth day of work, and I don't feel like getting another one, especially in the same exact place.  As they always say, insanity is defined as repeating a certain action and expecting different results. 

Anyway, my friend has a tailgating problem.  I mentioned it to him several times during our 6-hour car ride.  You realize you're riding that guy's butt, right?  "I am?"  He was surprised each time I told him.  I tried to explain the "one car length for each 10 mph" but it didn't seem to get through.  His rationale, offered kiddingly yet somewhat truthfully, was that he was so impressed by the driving ability of the person in front of him, he wanted to be as close as possible.  He backed off his gas for a few seconds and got a good 15 feet behind the person in front of him.  "This better?"  Keep going.  When he got to about 40 feet, I said that was good.  He quickly forgot about our conversation and went back to riding the tail of the poor person in front of him.  It meant a 6-hour, white-knuckled, herky-jerky ride. #travel