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Get my name wrong (9) Tuesday, Oct 10, 2006 11:45 am

The best way to make me immediately dislike you is to get my name wrong.  Call me Bill.  Call me Rashad.  Call me Steve [1].  Either way, call me "not your friend any more" because that's what I am.  I don't mind if you say, "What was your name again?"  Everyone's bad with names.  Chances are I don't remember yours either.  Just don't call me something I'm not.  For some strange reason, I take it as an insult, and I'll pretty much never forgive you.  I take it really personally, and I think it has something to do with thinking I must not be important enough for my name to be remembered.  In some circumstances, I'll readily admit to this like Lester Burnham in American Beauty:  "It's ok, I wouldn't remember me either."  But if you go out on a limb and get my name wrong, you're immediately put on my List of People Who've Gotten My Name Wrong.  For this very reason, I almost never use a person's name when I greet them, just in case I get it wrong.  I say, "Hey, how's it going?" or "It was good to see you again".  I could be completely sure of their name and I could be continually repeating it in my head so I don't get it wrong, but I end up not saying it because I don't want to cause what I would perceive as harm.  Yes, I have problems. 

[1] Calling me Steve will put you on the List of People Who've Almost Gotten My Name Wrong.  Steve is quite phonetically similar to Dave, so I'll let it slide.  Once. 

wendy Tuesday, Oct 10, 2006 12:35 pm

just today my big boss said, "Here's my $5 for the Wendy Hoosier fund" - ugh! I've corrected them a thousand times it's not that hard. Hoosier has two o's and Hosier has one. I mean it's not even like they're getting the ending wrong (which isn't necessarily phonetic), but the beginning - c'mon people!

Kripa Tuesday, Oct 10, 2006 5:22 pm

um - seriously?  are you two honestly complaining about people getting your name wrong?  granted you may not like it, but trust me, you have the easy end of the stick

Dave Wednesday, Oct 11, 2006 9:02 am

Getting the last name wrong is a whole different story. 

And you're right, Kripa.  At least my last name isn't the alphabet.  You're totally justified in seeking out a mate with a shorter last name.

Shara Wednesday, Oct 11, 2006 10:05 am

I think I'm used to people calling me by the wrong name so I don't even correct them anymore.  Granted, they don't call me Barbra when my name is Shara, but people cannot seem to say Shara.  I mean honestly, is SHARA that difficult.  Apparently it is.  I can think of only three other people, maybe, that say it the same way I do.  So, I accept two pronounciations and that's it.  There is the one pronunciation that most people who know me use, which I have, especially after going to school in the south, begun to accept as correct, and then there is the actual correct pronunciation.  There is a third pronunciation that I will not accept because basically, it makes my skin crawl when I hear it.  I wish I could verbalize these for you, but alas, I can't.  I would try to write out the pronunciations phonetically, but then this comment would be unnecessarily long.

Dave Wednesday, Oct 11, 2006 10:19 am

Yeah I usually don't correct people when they pronounce my last name wrong.  It's just not worth my time or effort.  But the first name is essential. 

Honestly, how do people mispronounce your name?  I think I've heard it pronounced with the first "a" either sounding like "cat", "car", "share", or "shear".  What's the right way?  I think I would go with "cat".

Shara Wednesday, Oct 11, 2006 3:02 pm

I say Shara with the first "a" sounding like "apple" (or "cat" in your case, but I usually use the word "apple" to describe it.)  But apparently then people have trouble getting the "a" and the "r" out in a nice flowy way.  Most people say it like "share" which I've come to accept as being as close to correct as I'm going to get from most.  The pronunciation that makes my skin crawl is when you say that first "a" like "bar".  That really kills me.  I absolutely cannot stand that.  You also made me realize that I hate when people say it like "shear".  So thanks for that. hehe.  I mean seriously, let's hope my parents wouldn't name me after Heman's girlfriend or whatever. 

So how do you pronounce it?

Dave Wednesday, Oct 11, 2006 3:37 pm

I say it like "apple" or "cat".  But there was a girl in high school named "Cara" and one of my friends used to pronounce her name with the first "a" sounding like "bar".  It was hideous. 

I'm glad I could introduce new ways to mispronounce your name. 

And by the way, She-Ra was He-Man's sister.

Shara Thursday, Oct 12, 2006 12:57 pm

Well, I'm glad you get my name correct.  I will add you to the list-of-totally-awesome-people-who-can-pronounce-my-name-correctly.  This is a VERY distinguished list.

And I'm terribly sorry I didn't know the lineage of She-Ra and He-Man!

Britt Friday, Oct 13, 2006 10:49 pm

My last name gets messed up all sorts of ways, but I try to let it go most of the time.  It always seems kind of ridiculous, though; "McKeon" is pronounced exactly how it sounds, yet people like to make it "Mc-Cue-En."  Growing up I thought it was just because of McKeown School, but it happens out here too (although less so, I guess).

Unless I'm never going to see the person again, I have to correct them if they decide to turn my first name into Britney.  Asking "Is that short for Britney?" is fine; going ahead and calling me by a totally different name is... ugh.

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