Garbage water is that mysterious liquid found in the bottom of garbage bags that leaks onto the floor when you take the bag out of the can.  Where does this stuff come from?  I don't throw out entire containers of liquid!  I don't dump out cups of coffee into the trashcan!  So how does it get there?  The explanation to this mystery continues to elude scientists and researchers around the globe. 

One time when I was about 11, I was riding my bike along the side of a road (not on the sidewalk because there was none).  As a garbage truck drove past me, I felt a drop of liquid hit my face.  Then all my skin melted off and spawned new little Daves, like the movie Gremlins.  Actually, it wasn't that big of a deal except that it was really gross.  I haven't ridden a bike or touched the side of a road since. 

I used to work at a McDonald's, where garbage water was king.  I used to have to take the big bags of garbage out to the dumpster.  Those bags had so much disgusting garbage water in them, they left a 50-foot trail of mystery liquid all the way from the can to the dumpster.  Disgusting. 

So the next time you think about throwing your drink in the garbage, think of that poor jerk who has to clean up after you.  You're ruining his day, his weekend, and his entire life.  Say no to garbage water!