Remember that one time, you went to Sea World, and you waited at the dolphin tank hoping at least one of those stupid fish would swim up to you, because you were some how special?

But instead, they would swim up to the little Mexican girl with the pink conciera dress for some weird reason, who totally didn't deserve to have ALL of the dolphins' attention.

And then finally as you gave up and secretly flipped the bird to the dolphins underwater, so your grandma wouldn't find out and hit you with her wooden shoe in front of everybody like she probably had just done a few minutes before that, one of those stupid dolphins finally swam up to you and you got to touch it, just for a moment.

Remember that? Do you remember how it felt? Like a rubbery wet balloon, filled with meat.

THAT'S how your face will feel when you use this shaver. Like a perfectly smooth, rubbery wet balloon, filled with meat.

Perfection.

If you aren't careful though, this thing will cut you... much like that little girl would have, had you dolphin-blocked her one too many times.