Postal Jun 9, 2005
Oh boy.  This really gets me.  I ordered something and had it shipped to our apartment.  Let's just say our address is something like 1 Main Street, B12-A19.  What does that mean to any half-brained no-talent idiot?  B means building, A means apartment.  This is universal.  It's not rocket science.  So you can imagine that I was slightly angry when the Fedex people called me at 8 p.m. and said, "Hi we can't find where you live.  Please verify your address."  They understood the problem; apartently it's the people that deliver the packages that are slightly under par.  So the next day I found out another great awesome thing:  they couldn't deliver the package and they said, "Oh wait, someone has to sign for it."  I hope this gets distributed to every living postal service employee on earth:  believe it or not, people work during the day.  This makes it so that they can't be home to sign for packages.  So don't be surprised when we're not home!  Idiots!  Maybe we can change this whole messed up system:  How about postal service people deliver stuff after 5 p.m.?  Oh wow.  I solved the stupid problem.  Just deliver this stuff when a few more people are likely to be home.  Sure, people work after 5.  But some people [thumbs pointing to self] get out of work at 5.  Try it sometime.

This brings up another gripe:  banks.  Bank of America, how am I supposed to deposit money if I can't do it through the ATM and your branch closes at 5 p.m.?  Oh maybe I'll do it in the morning.  Nope.  You open at 8 a.m., which, oddly enough, is when I'm at work.  Novel concept.  So how about this:  open at like 10 or 11 a.m. and stay open until like 8 or 9 p.m.  That would solve every problem on earth.  Commerce Bank does it.  They know what's going on.  That's why I'm leaving you, Bank of America.  You're big, stupid, and you won't accept my money when I try to make a deposit.  Up yours. #business
The system (2) Jun 6, 2005
I think the system of the world is kinda dumb.  Or at least it is in this country.  When I think about how I got to where I am, I don't regret too many of the choices I made.  But when I hear about kids who are just graduating high school and applying to colleges, I feel really bad for them.  Who thought of this system?  As the corrupt educational system is implanting left-wing propaganda into sterile young minds, they tell the students to choose a career path based on the things they've learned.  Do you actually expect a 17-year-old child to make a decision that will affect the rest of their lives?  That's crazy!  For me, it was relatively easy.  I was always pretty good at math.  What do you do with math?  Become an engineer!  Or a math teacher.  But since my interpersonal skills are abysmal, I chose to stay away from anything that would require interaction with other human beings, especially interaction that would require personal involvement and direct contact.  Engineering it is!  But think about these poor kids that are given a crash course introduction to physics and calculus.  Do you think they'll want to pursue anything like that?  No!  Or what about that aspiring young writer/singer/philosopher/historian?  You shovel some garbage into their minds about Berlioz and existentialism and you think they'll continue with that career path?  I guess I'm realizing that most decisions about the future are made before this stuff happens.  For me, I knew that Ms. Curcione's childlike romp through physics was only temporary.  Or at least I hoped.  And it was.  (On a side note, someone should really remove her from the position of affecting bright young minds and put her in some other place far, far away.)  And I suppose that those people that went into "liberal arts" didn't need to decide what they wanted to do until they got to college.  My only objection to that is that you can't really go into liberal arts and then decide that you want to study engineering, unless you're prepared to start over completely and go to school for another 4-5 years. #education
Mandatory training Jun 6, 2005
There's something indescribably beautiful about the words "mandatory training" that goes beyond my comprehension.  Mandatory, meaning "Required or commanded by authority; obligatory."  It's poetic.  And when the teacher of the class asks what I want to achieve by completing this mandatory training, how am I supposed to think of anything other than "fulfilling a requirement"?  There's nothing else there.  There's no desire.  There's no objectives or yearning for knowledge.  I'm in the dumb class because I have to be there.  That's it. #education
Blank Jun 6, 2005
What's the deal with the proverbial "This Page Intentionally Left Blank"?  What a waste of paper/space/brain cells.  Just the fact that the blank pages have that explanation makes them unblank by default.  Why are they blank to begin with?  Is it so hard for our confused little minds to comprehend when there's a change in subject that there needs to be an announcement?  How about this:  use different text.  Use headings.  Maybe an underline or a bold.  It's really quite simple.  It's been done before.  Did the Constitution have intentionally blank pages?  No.  They didn't waste the time and effort to create a blank page with that text on it.  They relied on a very complex numbering scheme.  There were main sections called "articles" and subsections called "sections".  It was really quite ingenious.  Try that, you big group of idiots that label their blank pages.  That goes for you too, Donald Merino, professor of Engineering Economics at Stevens Institute of Technology in Hoboken, NJ. #entertainment
Self Jun 6, 2005
I guess this shouldn't surprise me anymore.  Whenever people talk about what's most important to them, the most common answers are something along these lines: 
1.  My happiness/fun/health/safety
2.  My family/friends
3.  My work
I like to say "God."  It throws people off.  In my dumb class today, a few people said God.  I'd be interested in talking to them.  Most people said that other stuff.  One guy even said that he works to make money so that he can have a night life and enjoy himself.  He said, "I'm looking out for this guy," as he pointed to himself.  I guess I respect his honesty. #religion
Milestone (1) Jun 1, 2005
Today is the day.  I've officially been working for 1 whole year.  This is a milestone.  This of course means that I've been out of school for a little more than a year (graduated May 27, 2004).  In my first year out of school, I've accomplished every major thing that I'll ever accomplish, except having a baby.  I started my first fulltime job (June 1, 2004).  I got my first speeding ticket (June 6, 2004).  I bought my first car (July 10, 2004).  I got married (August 14, 2004).  I left the country for the first time (besides Canada) by going to Jamaica (August 15, 2004).  I went on my first major hike -- 26 miles (September 11-12, 2004).  I led my first intensive Bible study (September-December, 2004).  I went on my first company-sponsored business trip (September 28, 2004).  I gave up drinking (November 6, 2004).  I got my first promotion (December 1, 2004).  I spent my first Christmas away from my family (December 25, 2004).  I bought my first house (May 20, 2005). #business